Friday, September 16, 2011

An Interview With Myself

So, are you ready to do this interview?
As ready as I will ever be. Ask away!

Okay, let’s start off with a simple one. What is your dream job?
That's easy...To be a writer and photographer.

What’s stopping you from doing those things?
Money- or rather the fear of not making enough.

What if money were out of the equation?
Well yeah, for sure I would do it if I didn’t have to be dependant upon money to survive.

Don’t you think that doing something you are passionate about will bring success?
Yes, but what if it doesn’t.

That sounds like your fear talking.

What would be the harm in trying it. Like a test run?

What do you want out of life?
To be happy and loved and to have a feeling of security.

Do you have those things now?
Yes, I do and I feel very blessed.

If you could change one thing about your life, what would it be?
To be more financially secure enough to not have to worry about those things. To be able to do the things I want to do in life without financial limitations.

Isn’t that everyone’s wish- to win the lottery and get rich?
Yes, I suppose it is however it is more than just that. I don’t desire wealth to blow it on frivilous things or to waste it. I want to be able to do things I love to do and to enjoy every second of my life to get the most I can out of my life by harnessing the things I am passionate about. I want to be able to help others in a way that isn’t always possible without funds.

So money brings happiness?
No, not at all. It is your attitude about life that brings happiness and joy. The richest person on earth could be the most miserable unhappy person in the world so wealth does not automatically equal happiness. Money just makes things easier.

What else would you like to change about your life?
To be more in tune with nature and nurture my spirituality a lot more than I do.

What is preventing that from happening right now?
Me not making the time to do it.

Are you too busy that you can’t take time for it?
No, it is a matter of me not making it a focus or priority right now.

But it is certainly something you can change right, because if it were important to you then it would be a priority.
That is correct.

What do you value in life?
My spouse, my family and friends. Loving others and being feeling love and acceptance. I value honesty and integrity greatly and trust means everything to me. If you don’t have those three things, you don’t have a solid foundation in your relationships. Once trust is broken and destroyed it is very hard to gain it back from me.

Has trust been broken before?
Yes of course. It happens to everyone at some point in their lifetime but it doesn’t mean it hurts any less when it does. Betrayal and broken trust can be very hurtful but it also makes you take a good look at the lesson it brings too.

Which is?
Well for me, it taught me to trust my intuition and to not fluff it off when red flags are raised. It also made me a lot more cautious in who I chose to give my trust to. But overall that gut instinct is golden and I have learned to trust that a lot more than anything. It has never led me astray when I chose to listen.

Do you forgive easily?
I do to a fault sometimes. I am very easy going and most times I give people chance after chance, however past experiences have also taught me that forgiving somebody doesn’t mean you forgive and forget. It means you are more cautious the next time and you don’t put yourself in that situation again. You also have to know when it is time to move on from situations and people if you keep getting the same results.

Do you hold grudges?
No and I don’t believe in revenge either. Grudges and revenge only harms you more than it does the person you are directing it at and it serves no purpose.

What is important to you in life?
Being the person I was always meant to be in spite of where I came from. Being able to help others and fulfill my purpose in life that God created for my life plan.

How do you know what your purpose in life is?
I just do. It has become clearer and clearer over the years and talking with and listening to God speak to me has confirmed it.

So you believe in God?
I do. Without the Great Creator we would be nothing so yes I do believe, love and trust in God.

What about religion? Do you believe in religion?
I have experienced many different types of religions over the years and there is one thing I know and that is organized religion is very different from spirituality. I do not believe you need to go through a religious organization to have a relationship with God. I prefer to have a direct connection with God so I go directly to the source and I have a close spiritual relationship with God.

What is the difference?
I’ve always joked that religion is for people who are afraid to go to hell and spirituality is for people who have already been. Don’t get me wrong, I think if people choose to be involved in organized religions, that is great for them and that is their choice. I can see how people would enjoy the fellowship with other like minded individuals and the direction it provides for their life. What I disagree with is many religious organizations try to put their followers into a box that is very limiting based on their particular belief systems and they truly believe their way is the one and only way to God. They are convinced their religious path is the only right way to heaven and I just don’t believe that. I don’t know about you, but my God is all encompassing and he loves everyone- no exclusions. My God is not about fear and condemnation. He is the ultimate light source of love and peace and joyfulness. You can’t tell me that God would condemn people to hell that live in other countries where their cultural beliefs differ from some religion here in the United States. People all pray to God as they know him in all different nations, cultures and languages and I believe it is all the same God whether he is known as God or by many other names. God cannot be confined to a small limiting box and neither should we.

And what about spirituality?
Spirituality is about that direct connection you have to God the life source. It is the relationship and the core of your heart and soul being connected to the light of God that gives you that joyfulness and peace in your life. It is knowing that no matter what God is always by your side guiding you, encouraging you, protecting and loving you. It’s about talking directly to God like you would a friend and being willing to be quiet enough to listen to his answers. I have many great conversations with God and I prefer my relationship with him this way verses through a religion that is more about following their way verses God’s way for my life.

What motivates you?
(smiling) Many things do. Watching the sun rise in the early morning hours. Listening to beautiful music that moves my soul. Hearing a child’s laughter and witnessing excitement and wonderful delight in their eyes. The sound of gentle rain. The desire to accomplish things on my own. There are too many things to name… my drive and passion motivates me too as does anger.

Anger? How can that be motivational?
When you harness that anger to make changes that are positve to your life. Anger about something stirs passion inside you and it can definitely be a great motivator to get you moving into action to make positive changes.

What are you passionate about?
I feel passionate about a lot of things but one of the most important ones is the prevention of child abuse and being able to help others who have been abused. I am passionate about trying to make this world a better place even if it is just one small positive action at a time in my little part of the world. Anything you put out to the Universe has a ripple effect so I prefer to make my ripple a positive one.

Do you really think that makes a difference in this huge world we live in?
Well there is a quote I am reminded of that I will use to answer this one:
“Anyone who thinks they are too small to make a difference has never met a mosquito.”

Great quote and with that I think I’ll end. Thanks for talking with me, we will have to do this again.

Anytime. You know where to reach me. 

Friday, July 15, 2011

My Guilty Pleasures!

So what's YOUR guilty pleasures? :)

Wednesday, July 13, 2011

We Are Our Own Worst Enemy

Ever wonder why America is in the shape that it is? I mean we see more diseases than ever before, the economy is messed up beyond belief, the crime rate is higher than it has ever been, our government is making very poor decisions that is actually doing more harm than good for the very people it is supposed to serve, jobs are disappearing at an alarming rate, people are losing their homes left and right and we are one step away from economic collapse and disaster.

Is it any wonder? I mean look at the decisions we have made… we are killing ourselves by the very decisions that are being made for this country. I believe one of the reasons we are seeing more disease in this country is because our country is too lax on checking the food sources that are coming into this country. After the fact too many times we find that harmful pesticides or other toxins or bacteria are in the foods that are being shipped here from other countries. How many recalls have there been on foods in recent years? When I was growing up, you never had a recall on food much less anything else because back in those times we still believed in quality and took pride in the products and services we made and offered. That was the American way. That certainly isn’t the case anymore.

My question is, why are we not growing 100% of our own foods right here in the United States? Why are we relying on some other country to provide the majority of our food sources in the first place? We get food from countries that would like nothing better than to see the US fall flat on its face. Don’t you think that is kind of like sleeping with the enemy? We have US farmers right here in the United States who have been put out of business because somebody in our government made the decisions to import our foods at cheaper costs yet they don’t want to provide the quality checks needed to make sure those food sources coming in are safe for us to eat. Sometimes I think it is a matter of being paid off to look the other way. You rub my palm and I’ll rub yours. Somebody profits from it, but certainly not the American people.

Not only that but did you know that farmers here in the United States are not even allowed to purchase bulk seeds that have not been chemically enhanced with harmful pesticides unless it is specifically deemed as organic? Have you seen the prices for organic foods lately? Who can afford that? In many cases it’s against our governing laws to purchase untreated seeds. I was reading an article about how restricted local farmers are in trying to grow foods that are safe and natural and the struggles they come up against. Even if agricultural farmers wanted to grow safe foods here to provide our nation with our own resources, our country is not permitting them to do so unless they buy what the government says they can buy. Isn’t that sad?

Do you know that the US is and has been genetically modifying and treating our foods since the early 90's? And on top of that they are not even required to tell us about it on the labels that our food has been genetically modified. Here’s a sample; 93% of soybeans in the US are genetically modified, 86% of corn, 93% of cottonseed oil which is what vegetable oil and animal feed is made from, and 93% of rapeseed which is canola oil. They were genetically modifying tomatoes however there was a large failure rate in the softening of them so they took them off the market because they weren’t profitable.

Ever notice that chicken today has way more yellow fatty substance gunk than it ever used to years ago? Well it is because they are giving the chickens special feed which plumps them up at a much faster rate so they can make a quick profit off of them in less time. Chickens take time to grow normally which are natural and much healthier for you. But anything grown the regular way and not chemical enhanced with pesticides and other harmful products that is considered purely natural is now called Organic and you pay a premium price nearly doubled or tripled for it as if it is specially grown. It isn’t specially grown, it is grown the way nature intended it to be grown. Our government is altering our food sources to grow them faster, preserve them longer, and enhanced them with pesticides to resist disease and pests, yet what is it doing to us in the long run? Do you think they have tested this long term to see what kinds of effects it is going to have later down the road?

When our farmers do grow crops here in the US, they are not getting enough of a good rate at the market to make a decent living at farming like our pioneering farmers once did. There is too much government interference busy taking out their portion of the whole pie to allow anyone else their fair share.

I would be willing to bet a million bucks that if somebody investigated, they would find a direct link to all these rampant medical issues we are seeing in today’s world and find they are a direct result of the consumption of these pesticides. How many years have we been slowly poisoning people? People are dying younger, people are getting many more diseases that were never even heard of years ago and organs are failing at a much younger age than they ever used to. Now we see teenagers falling over dead of heart failure, more cancers than ever before and other infectious diseases on the rise. It seems clear to me… we are slowing killing off each other by the choices our country is making.

While we are on the subject of poisoning the people, anyone who has ever seen a commercial for any type of drug on the market only has to go down the long list of side effects to know that these drugs are not safe to use. There is a push and a rush to get these drugs out on the market as quickly as possible so they bypass all the rigorous testing that is necessary to even begin to know what the long term effects are to people. FDA takes their share of the cut to pass it through quickly so people will start buying the product so the pharmaceutical companies, their conglomerates and the government can all get richer faster. It doesn’t matter if your nose falls off and your skin turns green, just as long as they make a quick profit on it.

It’s the same with the job situation...we are killing our own livelihood. As we ship more jobs overseas because it can be made with cheaper products and cheaper labor rates, we are drowning out our own countries resources and manufacturing trades. Why are we doing that? Because our government and politicians gives huge tax break incentives to large corporations to shift production overseas and not only that they allow corporations to offshore their profits in countries such as Cayman and Bermuda, etc…. What does that cost us? Everything. It’s killing the United States and we are seeing that more clearly now, but it still continues to happen.

First of all nearly everything in America is not American made. It’s made in China, and not only that- it is cheaply made, so it isn’t going to last, or as we have found time and time again, it is made with toxic materials that are harmful to our health. Remember the recall of children’s toys that were found to have harmful amounts of lead in them? Mercury lead, heavy metals that are having harmful effects and or poisoning our people. Again we are not carefully checking the products that come into our country that is a danger to the American people. And who cares if these products result in a few deaths? Apparently nobody cares because they keep right on doing it. Even products that are labeled as American made…. Where do you think they get the supplies from?? Ding!! Ding!! Ding!!! Yep you guessed it.... Other countries! It isn’t truly American made at all.

We wonder why there are bridges and roads collapsing and causing deaths and horrific disasters in this country. Well… could it be that we are getting sub-standard materials from other countries that are cheaply made? It’s already been reported that the steel we get from other countries is not the same steel that was made with the strength and endurance that we used to make right here in our own country. Again why?? Would it be the almighty dollar? It’s because cheaply made products means more money in profits in somebody else’s pocket and that means a higher and quicker failure rate.

When it does fail and we look to the company, chances are that big wig has already vacated the building and taken his billions of dollars and ran off to some remote island somewhere and left the mess for some other poor sap to deal with. There is no responsibility or concern for anyone except himself. It’s a dog eat dog world and every man for himself. That’s what greed will do to you.

We wonder why we are so hard pressed to find American made products made with the quality that we used to be so proud of. Well it might have something to do with American businesses selling out to other countries at an alarming rate. In fact did you know that most companies here in the United States are not even American owned anymore? Our American companies that we worked so hard to build are now owned by Japan, China, Italy, Germany, UK, France, Canada and a host of other countries. We have given all of our power away by selling out. If it ever came to it, our country could be completely wiped out and destroyed in a heartbeat if these other countries decided to pull out every company they now have control of and own.

American businessmen are laughing all the way to the bank because they already got their silver lining by selling out. And why again is this happening right under our noses? It’s quite simple…it’s because of the greed and the need of the wealthy businessman to line their own deep pocket. Greed is America’s downfall and it will have lasting effects that are going to be irreversible. You don’t believe me? Then do your own research and you’ll see. In fact you’ll find that American made is difficult to find here and the quality sure isn’t what it used to be. It’s all about how cheap can we make a product and still make a high profit on it. No wonder nothing lasts anymore the way it used it.

Let’s talk about crime rate for a minute. Gee I wonder why there is an increase in crime in the United States? Hmmm... Could it be that one of the first things our governing political figures we so proudly elected have cut in their budget is the funds for police and fire? Well duh!!! It stands to reason that if the jobs of the people that are there to serve and protect us in our cities are being cut left and right that there is going to be an increase in crime because there is not enough manpower to serve and protect so something is going to suffer. That’s a no brainer. You take a police division of 125 officers and cut it down to half and those policemen are not going to be out on the streets patrolling and protecting the people. They are going to be stretched as thin as possible pulling double shifts.

No wonder there is an increase in gang related activity because these gangs know they can get away with it because police are not able to take back the streets and protect the citizens. Oh and if criminals do get caught, chances are they will be out again on the streets within 24 hours because of the overcrowding in jails. Listen to any court docket and you will witness a mere slap on the wrist over and over again for serious crimes committed. Obviously it does pay to do crime because you sure as heck aren’t going to be serving the time.

Let’s see, Casey got off, OJ got off, Lohan keeps getting off and many other famous sports starts and celebrities never pay for their crimes. Those are only the high profile famous cases we hear about. It goes on continually on a daily basis. Money talks and criminals walk. Can’t fit them all in those deteriorating cells blocks because we can’t feed them either, that budget has been cut too.

Let’s face it our whole judicial system sucks. It is totally ass backwards. Criminals with lesser crimes serve more time than pedophiles get for abusing or killing a child. Rapists get out in a year verses somebody caught using drugs gets 15 years. Evidence is thrown out on technicalities’ while witness’s perjury themselves on the stand yet get nothing. You want to get off for your crime then plead insanity. If that’s the case, then you should automatically be locked up for life and strapped down to a bed in the nut house because obviously you are a danger to yourself and all of society. The list goes on and on.

Don’t even get me started on the whole correctional facility system because if it were up to me, there would be no recreational time, no TV time, no phone calls, no education, no mingling with other prisoners or any benefits at all for criminals. You would be placed in a cell 24/7 serving your full sentence. No time off for good behavior because good behavior did not land you in the slammer. If you are on death row, you go directly to meet your maker right from the court house when you were sentenced to death. There would be no 20 year span waiting while we feed and coddle your ass. You did the crime- you pay for it and you deserved the sentence you got. Period.

Why is it that anytime there are budget cuts they always cut the most important things that should be preserved? They go straight for police, fire and schools… What happened to no child left behind? I guess that flew out the window. I guess our government doesn’t think our children- the future generation, deserves the funds to keep their schools in operation. Education matters? That’s a joke because obviously it doesn’t or it would be a priority. Do you know how many school buildings are left abandoned or in shambles and disrepair because all the funds have been cut by our government and the state budget? There’s no choice but to close them down and shuffle all in the kids into oversize classrooms where they will not get the attention and learning they deserve.

Instead, our government likes to throw away our money on wasteful spending and to pay their own overblown saleries and retirement funds. Let’s not even talk about how many of our US dollars are going overseas to build schools there and feed the hungry in third world countries while we have people living on the streets here in the United States with no food to eat and no concern to even help them. We still have hurricane victims from New Orleans who have no homes and there are no plans to assist them to restore their home and life back to the way it was. No our government would rather send our US dollars to help foreign nations and spend our hard earned tax money they steal from us to fight wars.

Don’t even get me started on healthcare, the extortion of medical costs or the fuel crisis or many other political decisions that do not help the American people to survive. There is a local radio talk show personality that says “Wake Up America!!” and I think he has it right. The sad thing is that by the time anyone wants to do anything about this to turn it around, I afraid it will already be too late.

This national debt we find ourselves in… is a direct result of Congressional decisions. They are the ones who vote on virtually every single decision that is made in our country. I know they like to put the blame on the President’s plan, and they go back and forth blaming the Democrats or the Republicans or whoever the President is at the time in office but they the Congressional elected officials who sit in their ivory towers are the true core of who controls this countries decisions that are made for the American people. You want to blame somebody, then put it where it rightfully goes. ON CONGRESS!

We wouldn’t find ourselves in this mess had there not been years upon years of wasteful spending and letting other countries carry all our debt. You want to know who owns America? I'll tell ya and you might be surprised. Here is the breakdown: China holds $727.4 bn of our US securities, followed closely by Japan at $626bn, UK at 157.9bn, Brazil at $129.9bn, Russia at $116.4bn, Luxembourg at $97.4bn, Hong Kong at $97.4bn and Taiwan at $97.4bn so pretty much the Asian market rules and owns most of America. I’d say we are walking a pretty narrow tightrope and somebody is bound to fall and get hurt soon.

What will happen if we collapse? My guess is as good as yours. It’s a scary thought but we sure aren’t helping ourselves with the decisions being made today. It will have a lasting impact long after you and I are gone.

Better think again about them survival skills in my previous post, don’t ya think?

This has been a PolarBear rant and I think I am done now... Maybe. :)

Monday, July 11, 2011

Survivor... Nope- Not the Reality Show!

Yep Ole PolarB's been thinking again about deep subjects, so might as well put it out there huh?

What would you do if our world were to suddenly change and alter life as we know it today? Would you be able to survive? Have you ever thought about the possibility? What if the world changed so drastically that in an instant it caused a complete shutdown of the way we live our lives today? All the government becomes non-operational because it shuts down, all the banks all close, no businesses are open, no going to work to your job anymore. You may be thinking, I have money I can survive on, but what if all your assets have been frozen by the shutdown and are no longer available to you? No businesses are operating so you can't rely on credit cards to get gasoline or food or essentials, so what do you do?

Think about it.... there is no running water, and no electricity. What would you do? Do you think you could survive? Would you know how to survive in this kind of environment? This is not to mention the possible panic that would set in with people if this did actually occur. There could be potential riots and looting and violence, we've already seen evidence of this before in the news in situations that were not as drastic as I am talking about, so it's a sure bet this would be much prevalent. Would you know how to keep yourself, your family and your property safe? How would you accomplish that? Are you prepared to defend your life and valuables?

What if world disasters were added on top of it, like nuclear threats, flooding, fires, war and bombings? Where would you go? Are you prepared to take your family and get out of dodge to stay safe and survive? Do you know how to survive without the modern comforts we have so come to love and enjoy and take for granted? I would be willing to bet that a lot of people would have a complete meltdown and be in a complete panic crisis being reactive verses proactive and be able to focus and come up with a plan of action.

If you think this is pretty far-fetched thinking, don't be so sure. There are many people already thinking about this very thing right now and taking steps to ensure they will be ready in case anything like this ever does happen. I've asked numerous people recently and was surprised that many people I know were already preparing and stocking up supplies and creating a plan for themselves in case we do have a world disaster of this magnitude. Who do you think is most likely to survive if this does occur in our world? The people that are going to survive are the ones who are prepared!!!

You think this is crazy to even think about this? I don't. In fact several of my
friends have already brought up this very concern as a discussion because it is on their minds. A quick search on the web will show you how many people and companies are already thinking ahead and helping people be prepared for this very thing. There is a surge of companies gearing up devoted to dehydrated foods and teaching people to start stockpiling now in case of an emergency. Rice and beans in huge bulk quantities are already being sold and bought up by people in preparation. This action has already driven up the prices on these types of items in the grocery store. You don't believe me, go check out your local grocery store right now. Dried beans used to be about a dollar but the recent demand has driven the price up and you are likely to see the price doubled and tripled now. I've been watching the prices rise over time in the last year or so and that means I am not the only one with this on my mind.

There are survivalists training camps popping up all over the place to show people basic survival skills. There aren't people who are whacked in the head taking these classes and training. They are high ranking executives of companies, doctors, lawyers, military people and regular people like you and me who want to be able to have the skills to survive if the need should ever arise.

Think about the basics... can you start and build a fire without the use of matches or a lighter? Do you know how to purify your water or build a shelter? Do you have the tools needed to do those things? Do you know how to be totally self-sufficient without electricity or the luxuries we take for granted everyday? It would be nice if we could depend on being safe in our homes, but what if that isn't the case? What if looting and violence gets so bad that it isn't safe in your own home because riots start occurring and people are coming in and taking your things for their own survival? Where would you go? If you had to go somewhere in an emergency, would you be able to survive? Could you survive living off the land or in the woods? What would you need? What would you take with you to ensure your survival?

I am pretty confident that I would be able to survive out in the elements and nature. I feel pretty much at home in those surroundings anyway and I've always had a survival instinct since I was a kid and I am very comfortable in a wooded environment. But what about the people who aren't? Are you one of them?

I feel lucky in many ways because Lovie and I adore camping and I mean roughing it, so we have a lot of things already that are needed to make a base camp in the woods. We also have backpacks filled with all kinds of gear already for when we go hiking that has a lot of emergency stuff in it. As prepared as I am with those things,there are still things I would like to gather to make my life more comfortable in case it ever comes to having to be in full blown survival mode.

I am preparing because I know this world is changing rapidly, especially with the economy and debt crisis our country is facing today, however I really don't think times are going to get better for us, in fact I think it could get a whole lot worse. We have never experienced true hardship like other countries have because the United States is a very privileged nation; however that could all change in an

All the signs are pointing towards it and we are not going to be exempt forever. If you are paying attention to the world economy, the government's decisions, the housing crisis, the foreclosures, the loss of jobs, companies bailing out and going overseas, the unemployment running out and leaving people high and dry, the threat that society security won't even exist in a few years... all the signs are already there, you know it is coming. I just don't know when. But I would much rather be prepared than left out in the cold and not knowing what to do. How about you?

I asked one of my friends what she would do in this kind of situation and she said, I am not worried because there will always be money and that will help me and my family to survive. If your funds are frozen and not accessible what good is money going to do you? Social status and wealth may mean nothing in survival mode but knowledge... now that is the key to survival. I hate to tell her, but money isn't always the answer... it may have been in the past but the value of the American dollar is rapidly declining and it would surprise me if it became a worthless piece of paper. Maybe we can at least use it to build a fire!

Being smart and being as prepared as possible is a much better option, don't ya

Care to share your thought on the subject?

Sunday, July 10, 2011

Hi-Ho the dairyo...a blogging we will go..

Hey Peeps...

Boy I have been a terrible blogger lately haven't I? I go for days and weeks and even months without posting a dang thing!

I am totally out of sync with this blogging anymore. I used to write every single day and lately I find myself getting further and further from it... BUT I do love to write and NEED to make time for it. It isn't that I don't have anything to say, because I assure you I have plenty to discuss and write about but time has just been getting away from me. I guess you could say that life gets in the way sometimes but that is a good thing.

When I started a blog back in 2005, I didnt even know what blogging was.. but I caught on fast and I found I really did have alot to write about. It was fun and in alot of ways very healing and releasing to me too. When you take the risk and put your heart and soul out there in your writing, that is the kind of thing that connects with others because out here on the other side of this keyboard is a real person with real emotions and feelings connecting with other real people reading on the other end. We all made some really great connections with people that we had never met in person but in some ways you got to know people on a much deeper level too in some instances.

I stopped writing because of one of those connections. A long term relationship I developed over time not just online but in person too, ended abruptly and I ended up being hurt because of it. So I felt it was time to pull back the reins and I was very disappointed in that I trusted somebody I thought I knew pretty well and found out I really didnt know them at all. I didnt know that somebody could be so cold and callous with other people's feelings and not only that but dishonest and hurtful to another person for no real valid reason. That isn't the way I operate and I don't treat people like that. I wouldn't treat a stranger that way much less somebody who was supposed to be a friend. So I ended the relationship. Even though it has been a couple of years ago.. I still don't get the why of what happened and I probably won't.

Anyway... I pulled back drastically and closed myself off to being open with others, especially online. I found that I no longer had anything to say and in alot of ways I see this as a self protection mode which was okay. We all have to do what we need to do and especially in today's day and age when online predators are rampant, it is good to not put yourself out there so much. We tell kids not to post things online for their safety and we should listen to that same advice!

The only down side to that is that alot of the things I wrote helped alot of people. Alot of my own life experiences and healing journey helped other abuse survivors so to not share in that way was a bummer. So I started a new blog on Yahoo 360 geared specifically towards healing from sexual abuse and it reached alot of women and was very helpful to alot of people. But Yahoo pulled the plug on their 360 site and all my words and blog disappeared into thin air. POOF! It was gone.

I have other resources that I use to reach survivors and give them helpful hints but it isn't quite the same as blogging. But honestly my life has been pretty great and I have been really enjoying living my life with joyfullness. I guess you could say I am doing what every survivor of abuse hopes to do.... THRIVING!!! That is a very good thing. So alot of the things I wrote about in previous years are not alot of things I experience now.

It has been fantastic to live life on my terms and to enjoy each and every day. I still want to help others and I most definitely want to continue to write, but finding the time and the place to do it is the challenge. I also don't want my blog to be just about surviving and abuse. I want it to be about all kinds of things. Things that are interesting to me, things that are interesting to you, things that are interesting to read. But mostly I write in a blog because I enjoy writing. If somebody happens to read it, that's just icing on the cake.

So hopefully I will get back to writing a bit more because my fingers are itching to stroke the keyboard.

Bear Hugs,
PolarB ;)

Thursday, June 23, 2011

Gay Pride?

My cousin went to the Pride Parade this year and came back with some photos she had taken. She posted them and they drew very many varied comments. This was one of them and it kind of provoked a reaction in me that I thought would be a good discussion or at least allow me to express my thoughts about it. Seldom does a photo do that so I wanted to write a bit about it.

I myself have never been to or participated in a gay pride parade. I've often wanted to go and even march in the parade to show my support for my community and my pride for who I am as a person. I am a proud out lesbian and I would like to see equal rights for all just the same as many other GLBT people would.

Some of the various comments this photo got from people were: How can gay rights be taken seriously when people show these kinds of behaviors? Someone else said I am not a homophobe but I get tired of it being shoved down my throat. There were other comments saying how people just want to be free and have fun and we all need to support and respect everyone's right to express themselves. Another comment was about pride and acceptance and about having the freedom to just be yourself without judgement.

My reaction to the photo was probably a mixture of all those rolled into one. I full heartedly agree that if you want to gain dignity and respect from others you should show dignity and respect not only to others but for yourself as well. If you want to be taken seriously, then act like it and basically don't make an ass out of yourself. How can we as a gay community expect to gain respect and support from others if you are engaging in behaviors that are disrespectful of others.

Personally I don't care if somebody chooses to bare it all to the world however, gay pride for me personally does not mean exposing my goods for everyone to gawk at. Why would anyone feel the need to do that, if not to just gain attention and for just the pure shock value of it? What message does that send? How does that help to gain respect and equal rights for the gay community?

Most certainly if I had children, there would be no way I would want my child to be exposed to the public nudity that was displayed. If a man shows his willy to somebody in a public setting, it is against the law and he is committing a sexual offense. So why would it be acceptable behavior in a gay pride parade? It doesn't matter if it's a man or a woman. That type of behavior is mainly to attract attention and to say look at me! So is that really pride or public voyerism under the veil of gay pride?

Expressing yourself and feeling the freedom to be who your are is one thing, but if you feel the need to walk around exposing your nakedness to everyone, then join a nudist colony. Yay for you that you are comfortable in your skin and want to show it off.. But the gay pride parade is not the appropriate outlet for that because it sends the wrong message and goes against the very thing we are struggling to gain- respect for our community and to show everyone that we are just like everyone else and deserve to be treated as such and have the same rights as heterosexuals have.

I mean seriously, if you are showing your pride for who you are by baring your breast or penis, what exactly are you trying to accomplish and gain? That you want the right to walk around naked with your nipples to the wind or your tally swaying in the breeze? Are you showing your goods to attract sexual attention? You want to be accepted for who you are because you feel rejected with clothes on?? Seriously!

If I had children I would teach them to value everyone and to show respect and dignity to everyone. It's how I live my life. It shouldn't matter who you love as we should show kindness and compassion and love to everyone valuing each person for who they are as a person. I have always been amazed at how suprised straight people are sometimes when they realize how much alike gay people are to heterosexual people. We are all the same people! We just happen to be attracted to and love somebody that is the same sex. We all put our clothes on the same way and have the same issues as our counterparts. It's called being human.

Sure there is a small percentage of people who are gay who behave like idiots and give the reputation of being sex starved perverts who go from one partner to the next, but then again there are just as many if not more straight people who do the exact same thing. All you have to do is turn on the news and see the daily sex scandal of the day....polititions, clergy, celebrities, sport stars. That small percent of folks is not the norm for all of us gay or straight. Most people live their lives with the same sense of normalcy trying to get by in this world we live in.

I understand the struggles that gays, lesbians and trans people go through. Nobody wants to be rejected for who they are. Nobody wants to be shunned and discriminated against just because they were born gay or born into the wrong body or even born with both sexes. The basic human need in this world no matter who you are is to be loved and accepted. Unfortunately we live in a world full of people who have a lack of compassion or understand for others, and who express hatred and violence toward those that are percieved different than them. Fear is what it is called. Fear of the unknown. The biggest thing is that if people were to really be open enough to see each other as human beings, they would find that there aren't as many differences as they thought there were.

Anyway... the photo was certainly a thought provoking one for me.... so what thoughts or reaction did it bring to you?

PolarB ;)

Tuesday, June 7, 2011

Hail!! Hail!!-- It was a Grand Ole Time!

LOL Sorry I am starting off with a chuckle or two but I am in that kind of mood. Lovie and I went camping on vacation for nearly a couple weeks and we went to one of our favorite places, which is the mountains of Tennessee. I tend to think of it as home because it feels like that everytime we go back there. I've been going to the Great Smoky Mountains since I was a kid of about 7 years old. My first trip there was with my grandmother and a carful of cousins back in 1971. I was awe struck then and still the peacefulness and beauty of the mountains always brings me back. I will retire there eventually, at least that is the plan.

It was nice being in the mountains again but more than that I always enjoy the friendliness and southern hospitality of the people. It is nice being in an area of the country where people are actually polite and have manners. People greet you with warmth and mean it and if you ever need any help, you wouldn't have to look far. It would be nice to be able to capture that and spread it to the rest of the world, wouldn't it? My home turf is far from this reality. Not my actual community I live in but the surrounding areas of the suburban and city sections which are being run over more and more everyday with gang activity and shootings and drugs. It's sad to see really and makes me want to head south even more than I already do.

Vacation was delightful even with two bad storms which ended up damaging my beautiful truck. I have about a 1000 dimple dents in my truck's body all over from golf ball size hail. It busted my windshield and my two side rain shields in the process. Never in my life have I ever witnessed hail storms that severe or that large! But I am not fretting about it, insurance will cover the damage so my baby will be good as new once again.

Lovie and I really did enjoy our trip. We experienced several new things that we had never done before. We went to the Ripley's Aquarium which was awesome. The shark tank alone was worth the price of admission. We went to Dollywood and got to tour Dolly's personal tour bus. We both rode the Big Woody and it was quite an experience for us!! Before you go directly to the gutter, the Big Woody happens to be a wooden race track where you drive these race cars up into a spiral and back down again. The wooden track makes it unique and loud and unbelievably fun! Lovie and I rode double and when we were coming down from the spiral, I guess I didn't realize I had brakes so I didn't use any! What an exciting ride it was! Besides riding Woody, we went geocaching and found over 40 geocaches that were hidden in pretty unique places. I guess you could say some places were off the beaten path and that made it more fun to search for them. We tried some new places to eat which was great and we checked out a possible area for when we move there. When the right thing comes along we will hightail it to the hills for sure.

All in all it was a great trip. We do enjoy camping and being in the great outdoors. I enjoyed coming back home and sleeping in my own comfortable bed though too! That is always a plus. Before we left it was cooler and raining every single day. In the mountains we went directly into 90 degree summer weather and when we got home it followed us here! We had quite a mess cleaning up the yard and getting it into tip top shape- mowing, weeding, trimming, mulching and planting, but it is looking way better now.

Until next time...

Bear Hugs!
PolarB :)

Wednesday, May 11, 2011

God Called & He Left You A Message!

Hello Peeps!

Hope today finds you in good spirits and enjoying life. The rains have ceased for a couple days to give us a bit of sunshine. I am really hoping it lasts long enough for me to go out and start working in the gardens soon. Gardening gives me great pleasure to see how a tiny little seed can grow and thrive into something so beautiful when the blossom finally opens up to reveal it's beauty to the world. People are like that too. they just don't realize it. A small seed can thrive and grow on it own, struggling for water and good soil yet with loving care and nurturing, the flower inside that little seed will really come to life and bloom abundantly with a little help and love. So will people. It's natures way.

I was thinking this morning how God works in mysterious ways and sends a message to you when you least expect it. You can never tell what or who he will use to get your attention. Sometimes things like that just make me smile. God must sure have a good sense of humor and is probably smiling right back at the irony of that, especially when he sees the realization on my face when it happens.

We've been working on house improvements some, updating and doing repairs and such. We try to do that each year with the tax money we get back. We discovered a while back that our water heater had a leak and needed to be replaced. Cold baths are not very appealing in the wee hours of the morning, so we knew it was past time to get it replaced. We also had a bathroom faucet that we wanted installed that we bought a couple years ago but couldn't install ourselves. Most times we are able to do all our own home repairs but we found out early on when we bought the house, that Lovie and I are definitely not plumbers. I can install a floor, paint, do wall repairs, electrical work, build things, install ceilings and many other various home improvements , but not the plumbing! I totally suck at that! So we know from experience that anytime it involves water pipes or plumbing, we call a professional plumber.

Dwayne is a guy we know that is the nephew of our septic guy. When we had a problem last year and our basement flooded, Dwayne is the one who came out and found the problem. Our main sump pump needed replaced so Dwayne fixed it for us at a reasonable price. He is a plumber by trade in his day job but he works on the side and doesn't overcharge all the extra fees that other plumbers do. If a part cost him $6.00 he charges us $6.00, not $47 dollars like most other service people do who jack up the price seven times so they can pocket the extra money. Dwayne actually shows us the Home Depot receipt and if he quotes us a price he sticks to it, even if he has to end up replacing a bunch of other parts, he does it free of charge because he sticks by his word. We offer him extra money and he always refuses to take it. We know we can trust him and he will tell us straight up good advice and products that are good and what isn't good quality products.

So Dwayne and another kid came out to install the water heater and faucet. Our old water heater lasted 29 years which was great, the new one will last about 8 years because they just don't make em like they used to. Quality in any product has went downhill because they have cheapened the materials so much to make products with lesser quality/cost and yield the manufacture higher profits. The GE water heater had a huge dent in it in the top but the box it came in had no sign of damage, which means it was packaged that way from the beginning. It didn't damage the water heater, as it was more cosmetically, but still paying over $400 for a product, you expect it to be good. Anyway, we decided to go ahead and just get it done since it would not affect the operation of it. So they installed the water heater and the faucet.

We discovered a leak in the pipes under the sink, but since it was already going on 9:30 at night, Dwayne decided he would come back the next day and repair the leak at no cost to us. It was separate from the faucet because it was coming from the actual pipes around the bolts under the sink. Dwayne came last night and took care of it and refused to take any extra money even though he replaced the bolts and hoses out of his own pocket. So all was well and it only took him about 30 minutes to get it done, but he was there for about two hours.

Dwayne is a talker. I have never seen a boy who can talk so much or so fast and he gets pretty animated when he is telling a story. I call him a boy, but he is a man in his early 40's, married and has two grown kids getting ready to have kids of their own. Lovie asked him about his wife and family and he started telling us all about his dad and his kids and some pretty funny stories about the SWAT team being called on his dad with a 7 hour stand off. Too long to go into but the point is that Dwayne can talk the bark off a tree. For some reason the conversation turned to telling us about his mama and how on her deathbed she asked for someone from their church to come pray with her, however nobody ever came because they were all too busy. That had a negative effect on Dwayne and he started talking about church and God and the Bible.

Now I would never figured Dwayne to be a religious sort of man, but what I do know about him is that he is honest and dependable. Dwayne will tell you himself that he doesn't go to church and he is a sinner. But as sure as I know God, I know this man is destined to be a man of God and to preach the gospel. I am not talking about in a church, I am talking about to the people who live on the streets and the ones who need it the most. Just like Jesus did. I am sure Dwayne had no idea that when he started talking about church, and the Bible that he would be the messenger for God to get a message to me about something I had been pondering on for a while. But sure enough standing there at our front door for about an hour and half, Dwayne did just that.

I have to smile at the irony of that. God heard my prayers and questions and he sent our plumber to deliver the answer. I wasn't expecting the answers to come like that, yet it doesn't surprise me either. Yes indeed, God works in mysterious ways. I am sure that Dwayne probably left scratching his head wondering why the conversation took that direction too, but if I know him, he will realize it later and heed to his true calling and purpose. He's a fantastic plumber but that man is destined to become a true man of God, he just hasn't realized it yet.

Thanks God for the message. I got it loud and clear. :)

Until next time,
PolarB ;)

Sunday, May 8, 2011

Mother's Day

Every year this day always brings me a mixed bag of emotions. I just never know what kind of feelings it is going to bring up for me or what I am going to pull out of the bag. Shake it up and see what falls out...

I wondered today what my birth mother feels or thinks about this day. Does she think of her two kids that she abandoned and wonder what they are doing on this day? Does it make her regretful that she made those choices? Or does it even phase her at all? Does she feel sad because nobody acknowledges her on this day reserved for showing appreciation to your mother.

Sometimes it brings up anger for me. Why would I acknowledge a woman who was never a mother to me? She did give me life by birthing me, but other than that, what else can I feel appreciative to her for? Nothing really because she was too non existant in my life.

I felt sad this year on several levels. One because not having a mother growing up left a hole inside me for many years that is still there. Most times I can fill that aching void with other things. People in my life that I am appreciative for. There have been many. Yet none of them are a true mother no matter how much I try to imagine that they are. That is a loss I will always grieve for.

As well, I get a sense of my own womanhood as well knowing that I will never get the privledge of being a mother myself. That makes me sad some days too. I would have made a fantastic nurturing mother. But things don't always work out how we think they will and we deal with the lot we have been given. I grieve for the loss of my only child just as much as I grieve for the loss of my childhood.

It's days like this that make me do alot of deep profound thinking. Pensive, and a bit sad yet still I will move forward and live my life with joy in spite of it all.
I don't know why it surprises me still sometimes that the grief sneaks up on me. I guess I can attribute that to it is always a journey of continually moving forward. Just like moving along a spiral.... upward and onward.

Sometimes that's all we can do.

Sunday, May 1, 2011

Oct 1st 2005 First Blog Post

In honor of Blogstream closing tonight, I wanted to repost my very first blog I wrote back on October 1st, 2005. It was the start of something pretty wonderful which led me to make friends with vitual strangers who become a very close knit community of close friends. There will never be another blogging community quite the same, as the ole Stream had a touch of magic to it that was undeniable. Anyway.... here it is, enjoy.

Oct 1st, 2005

Good Morning!

Ahhhhh, need another cup of coffee to get me going. Wow,I am sooo glad it is the weekend..

One of my most recent discoveries has been this blogging- I got an email from Angela Shelton the other day, who by the way is a most amazing woman for getting her voice out there about sexual abuse of children... keep plugging away Angela- even if it's only one voice at a time- we will all be heard until it cannot be ignored anymore....

I'm getting off track here... any of the links on her website was Rosie O'Donnell's blog site, which I did not know about. Ro and Angela are friends so I decided to check it out.

A lot of the site is Ro's political views which she feels very passionately about- which everyone is entitled to their own opinion... some I agree with, some I don't - that's the beauty of having your own mind so you can make intelligent decisions for yourself. Take what you like and leave the rest....

Anyway, I was reading some past blog she had written and came across one where she was talking about being in a store shopping for clothes and she noticed a man came in who was apparently mentally challenged. you know the ones that society tends to back away from because they deem them crazy.....People have fear of things they know nothing about... Millions of people suffer from schizophrenia but they are out on the streets because unfortunately they don't have someone in their lives to help them and care about them enough to make sure they are taking their meds in order to function in society.

Anyway, Ro wrote about going up and speaking to him and looking into his eyes and seeing the person who was deep inside and treating them with respect. Treating him like a human being that he probably does not find in others too often...which is a shame that we as a society do not take care of one another and have respect for another life...

In reading this I was moved by her compassion. Ro may be a lot of things to many people and some of them people are not always nice and pleasant...which is unfortunate, but imagine how hard it must be to be in the public eye and have every move you make criticized or blown out of proportion all in the name of selling those rag mags...I applaude her courage to live her life whether anyone is looking or not.. The way I see it, Ro is being real and true to who she is- she has such a big heart and she has been through way much more than we the public eye will ever know... You can tell she was deeply affected by her mother's death and still is to this day... if you go to her site and read the blog- you can read between the lines of what has been written and get a glimpse of who the woman really is- she has a beautiful soul and I love seeing the pictures of her kids and the way she has opened her heart for them... Saving little lives and making a difference to them.... I only wish all children in this world had that same chance...

Anyway... Ro is actually the one who inspired me to start my own blog... so hence- here we go.......

Til we meet again,

Thursday, April 28, 2011

"I Will Not Die An Unlived Life"

Recently I read a book that I really enjoyed. Such great information in it and I could apply it to my own learnings in my life. It was a book called "I Will Not Die an Unlived Life" by Dawna Markova. I was so inspired by her writings yet a few quotes really struck a cord with me so I wanted to share it with you.

"We have to learn to practice the art of stripping away false notions about who we think we are so we can deal with what is real, and release anything that is deadening to our spirits. "

"We learn to reconnect with ourselves so we can stand for something that is greater than ourselves."

How utterly amazing is that? Those two sentences are filled with a wealth of wisdom that I am sure it came from the Divine above.

Is what we think of ourselves how others see us? Most times it isn't. Perfect example of this are how many times have you experienced yourself or heard of somebody who thinks they aren't smart enough, good enough, pretty enough because they have a view of themselves that is vastly different than how others see them. Many women suffer from this affliction and it is the furthest thing from the truth.

Or how about the flip side of that, you know somebody who is boastful with a grandiose attitude, they are loud and obnoxious and it is obvious to everyone around them that they aren't really all that they say they are, in which others prefer to avoid contact with that type of person. I am willing to bet they think they are the greatest thing since sliced bread and have a puffed up image of themselves. Celebrities and politicians suffer from this affliction often, but I won't name names....

I really like what Dawna had to say about releasing anything that is deadening to our spirits- this includes old messages and things that you are holding onto that no longer add value or apply to your life. Things that hold you back from your true potential. Much like a woman who has experienced domestic abuse. She may have been told from her abuser that she was ugly, or stupid or many other things that were not true. Her self esteem has taken a beating and many times after periods of abuse, she may begin to believe those lies, but it isn't her reality.

She has to strip away the old messages and replace them with what her truth and reality really is and focus on things that are life-giving and uplifting which are true. Those old negative messages learned from childhood, or unhealthy relationships are things that pull your spirit down and most times it is not an accurate reflection of who you really are. Get rid of that crap- you don't need them. They are self defeating and do nothing to lift your spirit up. Lose them! Strip them away and live your reality and truth of who you really are! You are good enough, you are smart enough, you are a beautiful person and your spirit deserves to shine and let everyone see just how amazing you really are!

If you have relationships that are defeating you and dragging you down into a sea of negativity, maybe it's time to take stock and look at them honestly and ask yourself if you really want this type of relationship or person in your life. Get rid of the things that no longer serve a positive purpose so that you can live your life with joyfulness that focuses on nurturing the things that uplift and feed your spirit and soul in positive ways. Keep the things that are life-giving to you and get rid of the rest!

Dawna shares her story of how she is experiencing deep soul searching seeking answers for her life. I have been in that place many times and through it I gained wisdom and knowledge from it. God works in mysterious ways. He brings things to us so that we may learn and grow from them. We may not always understand it or even like it when we are going through it yet when we come out on the other side, we can see the lesson we were meant to learn with clarity. Not to worry- if you didn't quite get the lesson the first time, God will present more opportunities for you to learn. He is good like that!

I am thankful for my lessons. I feel so blessed and I know that even though many times I felt totally and utterly alone, I was not alone at all. The reality was that God was right by my side, guiding and nudging me ever so gently. Even when you are struggling and feel alone, you aren't. He let's us find our way so the lesson and experience will be meaningful and connect to us. I am grateful for all my experiences because in the end it has brought me closer to the Divine. I will not live an unlived life either. I will grasp it with both hands and enjoy the ride, experiencing all it has to offer growing in the process!

I am able to allow God's love and light to shine through me to others. I know it is my purpose in this life and I am reminded of the song "this little light of mine, I'm gonna let it shine." Yes, I will let it shine, even when it is but a mere faint glow in the darkness and when others try to snuff it out, the light still shines within me. It always has and it always will.

Count your blessings, for they are many.

Bear Hugs,

PolarB ;)

Tuesday, April 26, 2011


Okay I put it off for far too long and the last few days been working like a rabid Kinko copier copying all of my posts, poetry and fictional stories from three of my Blogstream blogs. Whew am I ever glad to get that done.

The other blogs I won't worry about when they disappear because it was just a recipe blog, an inspirational blog along with a music blog. Those I can create anywhere. The stuff I really wanted to save the most was some of my writings. It takes a long time though to go through years of writings!

I find I am writing alot more and that is always a good thing. I felt like I had a writing block for a long time, plus the fact that for a long time I no longer wanted to share anything on the stream because I didn't want my words used against me like they had in the past from a former friendship that was on the stream. I guess you could say it made me gun shy and really who wants to be hassled. No regressions though...and no regrets.

I hooked up with two authors recently and that is actually pretty awesome. We are communicating back and forth through emails and that is pretty cool. I am finding that these opportunities keep being presented to me to connect with other authors and maybe it is a good thing because it may just spur me on to move further than I ever have with my writings to the next steps.

I have been feeding my creativity with writing prompts which are really provoking some good stuff. Deeper insights into who PolarB is and soul releasing good stuff.
Who knows what will come of it but for now I am enjoying writing as fast as my little fingers will fly across the keyboard!

It's all good! Tally ho for now-- enjoy your day Peeps! I know I am!

Bear Hugs!
PolarB ;)

Sunday, April 17, 2011

Respect & Kindness

Respect and kindness
Being rude doesn't feel very good even while you're doing it. Being genuinely considerate, on the other hand, can leave you feeling more positive and empowered for a long time afterward.
Rudeness and arrogance are unmistakable signs of weakness and insecurity. Kindness and polite consideration are reliable indicators of rock-solid confidence and strength.

How do you treat those whom you have no reason to impress, from whom you have nothing to gain? It says a lot about you, and people do indeed notice.

Those who are truly in a position of responsibility have no need for arrogance. Any positive impression you seek to make through arrogance or rudeness is immediately contradicted by the arrogance itself.

Don't let your own arrogance waste your energy and set you back. Use each encounter as an opportunity to offer genuine respect and kindness.

Lift up the lives of those around you. And you lift up your whole world.

-- Ralph Marston

Ralph I couldn't have said it any better.

Showing respectfulness and kindness to others is my personal creed and it will make a major difference in your life if you let it. Allow the loving kindness flow to others and you will find that goodness feels rather wonderful when you spread it around to others. I love the feeling it gives me when I can bring a smile to someones face or to lift their spirits.

There is already way too much negativity in this world and if we are to make a difference in this world we live in, it begins with YOU. How you treat others and how you allow them to treat you sets the tone of your life and the world around you. Simple as that.

If you choose to be rude and arrogant to others, it only reveals your own insecurites. I find that people who do that are trying to prove to themselves that they are right or better than others in order to feel good about themselves. Does it last? No. Because they are hurting themselves more than they are hurting others. They are grasping at trying to feel powerful in some small way because in reality they feel powerless.

I mean really, if you find yourself doing that, how is that working for you? That witty sarcasm that you lobbed may give you a jolt of pleasure for a second or two but really when you choose to direct negativity towards others, it only comes right back to you and usually worse than what you dished out. Karma really does exist and then it doesn't feel so nice when somebody lobs a direct missile at you. So was it worth it?

Why bother even playing that kind of verbal sparring game? I'd just as soon head the other direction when somebody starts that kind of mentality with me. I have no interest in relationships like that. I refuse to participate in toxicity with people. Go play on your own playground all by yourself because sooner or later you will be playing all alone when everyone gets tired of the negativity and walks away.

How you treat others says alot about you. When you treat others with loving kindness and mutual respect it opens up your energy level and frees that energy to be used creatively and you are able to see the goodness and beauty around you. You begin to really see all the many blessings you have in your life and your realtionships with others are on a much deeper level of connectedness and one of mutual respect.

Each day holds the opportunity to make your world a better place. What will you choose to do?

Thanks to Ralph for his inspiration. He certainly spurred my creative juices. My peeps, be blessed and continue to show love, kindness and respect to all those who cross your path.

Love & Bear Hugs,

PolarB ;)

Thursday, March 24, 2011

Create Your Best Life

Create the best

Calm your thoughts and be peaceful. Know that all is well, all the time.
This moment is already the best it can be, and is everything it can be.Accept it and move forward.

Do not fear the worst, for your thoughts of fear give great power to whatever it is you fear. Instead, sincerely expect the best and you create the best.

Know that the positive possibilities are always present, and your eyes will be opened to them. Everything that is, can be put to good use in moving toward your highest vision for life.

As life unfolds in each moment, new opportunities are being born.No matter what has already happened, choose to create the very best you can imagine.

This is the day that you have to work with. Live with peaceful purpose, and use it to create a magnificent world.

-- Ralph Marston

I love Ralph's words. It is so true and there is value in what he is saying. It is one of the things that I love so much about listening to Joel Osteen every Sunday morning. It is that positive vibe and knowing that you have the ability to create the peaceful life that you want to have. Just like Ralph says, "No matter what has already happened, choose to create the very best you can imagine. Know that positive possibilities are always present."

If you are surrounded by chaos, you have the ability to create a calm peaceful environment around you. Some people doubt that because they like to blame everyone else around them for their own circumstances. Maybe your kids are always fighting and your spouse is always in a bad mood and yells a lot. Maybe your life is not what you desire it to be. Do you add to the problem or do you become a part of the solution by leading the way? In other words do you yell and scream back that you want peace and quiet and if so, did that ever work for you? No. Of course it didn't. How would you ever expect to gain peace and quiet if you are not being peaceful and quiet yourself? The thing is...that you can't control how other people react nor can you make somebody do something that they don't want to do. You can only control you. You can only change your own actions and behaviors and thought processes.

People like to use excuses saying you don't know what I have to put up with or so and so makes me so mad I have to get loud and angry in order for others to hear me. No you don't. It is a choice. If you do not have a peaceful calm life, it is because you are not choosing to have a peaceful calm life. It doesn't matter what happened yesterday. It doesn't matter who did what to who. You do not have to get back at them or nor should you expect them to change just because you want them to. You can only change you.

Sometimes I feel surrounded by noise and it gets to me. I love peace and quiet because it brings me serenity and that feeling of peacefulness makes me feel good inside. However, I work in a very busy office and there is constant noise all around me all day long. Phones ringing, keyboards clicking away as people work, people talking and conversing all around me in a hundred different conversations all going on at once. Sometimes it is so loud it is hard to even hear myself think. It's those days that it really tends to get to me. Sometimes it is hard to block it out and I start to feel unfocused and scattered and I have the need to just have sweet peace and quiet. I can feel myself getting agitated at all the constant noise & chatter. When I go home at the end of the day, Lovie has the TV blaring because she likes to have it on at all times so the noise level around me may still be bothersome to me because all I want is to just be quiet and listen to the silence. I don't expect Lovie to sit quietly catering to my desires nor do I think she should have to change her routine. I could politely ask her to turn off the TV but why should I expect her to change her behavior just because I want her to? I don't, because I have the ability to go into another room where it is quiet to calm my world. I take myself out of the situation by retreating into the bedroom with the door closed or I have the option of going downstairs in the family room to fulfill my desire for peace and quiet. See how that works? I have the ability to change my own actions to create the result I am seeking.

Let me give you another example. Let's say you get into a heated conversation with somebody and you feel you aren't getting any where near a resolution and in fact the more you talk to the other person, the situation is escalating and getting worse. What can you do? You feel yourself getting angry and you want to make sure your point of view is understood by the other person. What can you do? Well the thing about it is that if you are having conflicting viewpoints, you most likely are just going to continue to butt heads. Because you want the other person to see and understand your viewpoint and basically agree with you and guess what? The other person is going to stand just as strong in their convictions and arguments because they are wanting the exact same thing. They want you to understand their viewpoint and to agree with their belief systems, unfortunately their belief system is not always going to jive with your belief system and that is okay.

Maybe the best solution would be to both agree to take a step back and say okay I think we need to take a break from this conversation because we are not coming to a resolution and we need to discuss this rationally when our feelings are not escalated. Agree to continue the conversation at another time in order to come to a mutual agreement for all parties involved. Sometimes you need to step back for a bit of time to be able to see a resolution.

Lovie and I have done this several times. We may get into a heated discussion because both of us believe passionately in our belief systems and we want the other person to see our side and agree with us. It really doesn't matter who is perceived as right or wrong, because the real issue is, is that we want the other person to understand us and our feelings and to agree with us. Sometimes the other person is not ready to give up the conversation and they want to continue to try to get their point across. It is okay to say- "We are not getting anywhere with this conversation right now so I am going to not continue it at this moment. We will come back to it later to find a solution." and then walk away ending the conversation. Make sure you follow up though and go back to the discussion at a later time to mutually agree upon a solution. You will both be able to take the time to gather your thoughts and to find a better result. Sometimes you are not going to always agree with one another but you can both come to a mutual agreement of what is acceptable to both parties. Sometimes this requires give and take and that is okay and you can work together for the best solution for a win win resolution.

Too many times people feel like they cannot do anything about their situation so they just accept it feeling overwhelmed and defeated. Peeps, it doesn't have to be that way because you always have choices. I cannot say that enough. In every single situation or circumstance there are choices. You may not like all the choices but you can make the best decision that will help you to get closer to the outcome or goal you are looking for. So many times I listen to people and their words and hear how they feel trapped and hopeless in situations that they wish would get better but yet they take no action to make it better for themselves. Maybe it is out of fear, but as Ralph says when you give into your fears you are giving more power to what it is that you fear verses overcoming them, and triumphing over them.

Listen to Ralph's words and let them sink in....

"As life unfolds in each moment, new opportunities are being born. No matter what has already happened, choose to create the very best you can imagine."

"This is the day that you have to work with. Live with peaceful purpose, and use it to create a magnificent world."

It is possible and I wish for you the very best.

Blessings & Bear Hugs,

PolarB ;)

Tuesday, March 22, 2011

Our World....

Have you ever wondered what this world would be like if there were no hunger, poverty, hatred, war, violence, crime, weapons, greed, drugs, abuse, or disease? Would that a world of Utopia? Maybe not, but I think our world would be a much better place to live. Some days I just long for a place like that verses the one we currently live in.

Can you imagine living in a world where love and peace abound? Where neighbors cared about and helped one another in times of need? Where you grew your own foods and livestock, sharing in the abundance and there was no end to the plentiful bounty? Where no child would not be loved and cared for, where no one hurt one another intentionally. Where elders would be honored and taken care of, where disease would not thrive and take those we love. Where you walked down the road and greeted others with a warm hello genuinely caring about how they are doing and what is going on their lives, celebrating the triumphs and joys of new births or good news shared?

Times used to be a lot better than what we are experiencing today and I am wondering where we went so wrong as a society and a nation? Today's world even compared to the 60's is vastly different. The 60's were vastly different than the 30's and so on and so on... So why do we seem to keep further and further apart from that connectedness to each other? How did we get so off track in separateness that it is now a dog eat dog world filled with selfishness and greed and violence?

What is the root cause of the changes that we see today? Is it that we have lost the values and morales of the earlier years? Is it because of technology and the drive to be the most advanced has driven people to these measures? Where did the need for speed occur? Everything has to be bigger and better and faster and more powerful. Why?

It's not bad enough that everything we own has to be the most advanced fastest technology, but people are even dissatisfied with their own bodies and want them to operate faster too. They drive their hearts and bodies to perform at a faster rate with these super shots of caffeine and energy drinks. Do you know what that is doing to your body? Does anyone know what the long term effects are to your muscles, your organs and your heart? People are going to blow out their organs with this stuff. It already makes your heart rate increase beater fast and faster giving you that adrenalin rush. That can't be good for your body or your system.

How have we gotten to this place? The bigger question is how much further are we going to go before this world just implodes on itself?
We are seeing the effects and still not changing this cycle. We are destroying our world slowly but surely. Wars are breaking out all over the world, nations rising up against their leaders. Thousands of innocent people are dying every single day. Children becoming killers in our schools and in their own homes, rising up against their parents slaughtering them. People killing and murdering their own children. Gangs of youth killing people just for the fun and sport of it. How did we get to this place of such desensitized violence? Do we blame it on video games? Do we blame the media and entertainment industry for making films that showcase violence so much that it has numbed us all to the realities that such acts bring?

People are starving to death every single day. Families not being able to provide for their needs, children going without food. Homeless people living on the streets in filth. With all the resources and abundance we have in this vast world, why are people starving to death and living on the streets? We have abandoned buildings sitting in despair rotting away while people sleep under bridges and in the cold. Why? I ask why is this continuing to worsen?

More than ever there are diseases killing people. Where is the technology and advancement for those things? We are killing and poisoning ourselves by the things we are doing to our foods to make them grow faster to last longer to be bigger, to mass produce them. Why can't people see that? Have you ever looked at ingredients in our foods? Why are we not eating natural foods grown the way they were intended to grow? We lace everything with insecticides and douse them in chemicals to make them last longer. We shouldn't be eating these things but our government tells us they are okay so we eat it anyway.... and then we wonder why there are so many new diseases cropping up killing people! Look at the connections. We are slowly killing ourselves by the ways we are doing things today. When are people going to wake up?

Addictions and drug use is at an all time high, literally. Murders, theft, rapes, abuse, violence, greed, scams, and so much more is rampant in today's world. We are battering our world and seeing the results of it every single day on the news. Is it any wonder we are witnessing so many world disasters? Earthquakes, tsunamis, hurricanes, tornados, volcanos erupting, nuclear threats, airplane crashes, buildings crumbling, bombs killing multitudes of people...and the list goes on and on. Where does it end?

I don't know that any one thing is to blame. We have evolved over time to arrive to this place because of all the things we have done or not done. Blaming doesn't solve anything. Pointing the finger doesn't create solutions. Are you willing to be part of the solution? When will things start turning around and when we will begin healing all the damages we have done to our own land, to our communities, and to each other? There are people who want to change this cycle and reverse it...but is it enough or is it too late?

Sometimes people get so involved in their own little safe bubble of a world around them... however that little bubble of yours is part of this great big world we live in. Is it helpful to dig in and bury your head in the sand and ignore it or do you want to change your world for the better? There was a quote I posted last week that said, "If you think you are too small to make a difference, then you've never been in bed with a mosquito."

Be the change you want to see in this world.

PolarB :)

Sunday, March 20, 2011

10 minute Relaxation

Are you feeling stressed and your mind is constantly busy with chatter and thoughts of all you have to do in your day? Why not take just 10 minutes to sit and relax to calm your mind, body and spirit. You can do it. It is okay to take care of yourself and your spirit.It's okay to stop all the mind chatter for a few moments and you will find if you do, you will be able to handle those unexpected moments and the stress and the worry a bit better.

Let's start by taking a nice relaxing breath in and hold... and then exhale letting all the stress seep out of your body. Feel it releasing from your muscles and your mind. It's okay to just let it go and to just be for a few minutes. Again, let's take another nice deep breath and hold for a moment and then exhale. Feel the tension moving out of your body as you exhale and let go.

Sit for a few moments with your eyes closed while you listen to a soothing soft melody. Can you imagine the sitting right on a beach, the warm sun shining down on you, relaxing you. It's not too hot, not too cool, but just right the way you want it to be perfectly warming your body making you feel comforted and secure and peaceful. Focus on your breathing and let your breath follow the pattern of the ocean waves inhaling slowly and as the waves flow back into the ocean, you exhale with it letting the waves carry your stress and worries away with the healing waters.

Just listen to the soft music for ten minutes and allow yourself to just BE.... If your mind starts to chatter once again just redirect your focus back to your breath and to the soft music with the ocean waves.

When this video ends you will open your eyes and your spirit will feel refreshed and you will be ready to take on your day whatever it may bring. If you start to feel stressed and anxious throughout the day know that you can always close your eyes and come back to this very moment where you felt relaxed and calm. Feel free to come back here as many times as you like to calm your spirit. It is like taking a nice breath of fresh air.

I send you peace and blessings,PolarB ;)

Thursday, March 17, 2011

My Love of Camping...

Good morning Peeps!

Hmmmm... what shall I write about today? We have a camping trip coming up soon and I always look forward to that for many reasons. One is because we are outdoors most of the time and enjoying nature and all it has to offer. I love to hike so when we go to the mountains, I can hike until my legs fall off and that is just fine with me. The mountains can be so beautiful and being in the woods was always a great love of mine since I was a kid. Of course when we go hiking in the mountains now, we have to always beware of the dangers such as bears and snakes. We've had experiences with both. Now I have a bear bell that hangs on my backpack gear to give warning that we are approaching in case there is one in the area. Always be on the alert to stay safe and keep your head up while taking in all the magnificent scenery.

I just adore the sound of a mountain stream trickling and we always take plenty of time to explore and play and climb a bit on the rocks. We taken a swim in an ice cold mountain stream too and it is refreshing and exhilarating to say the least! The mountains and streams are so soothing and it feeds my spirit. Sometimes I think it would be very cool to be a pioneer and live off the land whenever we go to the mountains. I could totally survive in a little cabin in the woods, with a garden full of wholesome vegetables and herbs, a few chickens and livestock and you could enjoy the good peaceful life. I know it would not be all fun and games and living off the land would require a lot of hard work. But hard work can be satisfying if you are bearing the fruits of your labor. Just like all the hard work we put into our gardens and when the flowers bloom and give us the beauty it beholds, we sit back and smile and are proud of our accomplishment from all the hard work we put into it. There is great satisfaction in that.

Another reason I love to go camping is it is my down time to focus on writing. I have a Neo writer that I take with me and the reason I like that so much is it only requires batteries and they last a really long time. I can go sit in the middle of the woods somewhere or on a rock by a stream and write to my little heart's desire. It holds up to 8 different projects and when I get home all I have to do is download it into my computer. So I really look forward to working on some of my projects while we are camping. It's great for rainy days too because I can still sit outside on the cabin porch and write and write and write to the soothing sound of rain.

I've always loved camping since I was a young kid. I have a very fond memory of my first camping experience and it probably is what started my love of the great outdoors. When I was 7 years old, there was a family that wanted to adopt me. They had a son who was a couple years older than me so I would go over and play at their house every time my father did work for their neighbor. Over time they got to know me and they asked if they could take me on their family camping trip. It was the first time I had ever been camping and I fell in love with it right away. We got to grill outside and have campfires, Robbie and I went hiking and went rock climbing and I had so much fun I didn't want to ever leave. At night I got to sleep in the top bunk and it rained one night and the sound of the gentle rain on the roof of the camper was so soothing and I believe started another great love of mine, hearing the gentle rain falling softly. Every time I hear rain like that it takes me back to that fond memory and good experience in my life.

I camped with friends when I was a teenager, rowing out to a little island somewhere and pitching our tents, getting soaked in the rains and frozen to the bone, but still all in all it is always fun. Lovie and I have camped since the very beginning of our relationship. Many times we would take off and sleep in the truck before we bought a tent. Our camping arrangements have changed over the years as we get older from trucks to tents to camping cabins but still we love camping. One day I am going to buy one of those nice RV camping rigs and we will go camping in style. But for now we love our cabins.

Well I suppose that's about it for today.... ta ta and Happy St Patricks day!

Bear Hugs!
PolarB ;)

Wednesday, March 16, 2011

I'm Not Invincible...

Hey Peeps, PolarB here...

Today was one of those days that shows me I am not invincible as I might hope I am and that I do have to watch my health concerns. Typical morning doing my regular routine at work and then whammo! Out of the blue, something happens and I am thrown into a full blown asthma attack and can't get a breath for the life of me. It's one of those times that you feel it coming on and you try to do things that will help like turning on the fan, and trying to focus and stay calm, try to take nice deep steady breaths, but nothing works and you know you are going to be in trouble in a matter of seconds. I grabbed my emergency inhaler and headed to the bathroom. Alot of times if I can just clear my lungs as they are filling up with the sticky goo that coats them that closes off my airway, I can at least begin to get some air into my lungs. But it was already too late and I knew it. I've been down this road many times before and know what to expect. What I didnt want to do was to go to the hospital and spend the day getting breathing treatments in the ER unless I absolutely had to.

The inhaler started working and opening up the airway after I was wheezing and gasping for air, I was able to get some of that stuff out of my lungs. The thing about using the abuterol inhaler is it is an immediate head rush that makes me very dizzy and light headed but it does what it needs to do on my lungs to open up the bronchial tubes so I can get air into my lungs and start to breathe like normal again. The downside of that and the asthma attack is it completely knocks me for a loop. I couldn't stand up and walk without help because I felt like I was going to topple over on my face. A friend had to drive me home and I spent the day in bed just totally wiped out.

I know what triggered the attack and it is something people don't even think twice about. Most times I can tolerate it and it doesn't bother me at all, but other times it affects me immediately or if my asthma is compromised anyway by changes in the weather or dust or anything like that, it is more immediate. Today it was triggered by a coworker who was wearing perfume. It's not the first time I have been triggered by scents and perfume but it is something that most people don't think anything about or dont realize the dangers unless they actually have asthma.

People die from asthma attacks yet there is a lack of education about the lung disease. There is no cure for asthma, which is a lung disease. Here are some facts about asthma.

Every day in America:

40,000 people miss school or work due to asthma.
30,000 people have an asthma attack.
5,000 people visit the emergency room due to asthma.
1,000 people are admitted to the hospital due to asthma.
11 people die from asthma.

That means every single day, 11 people die from asthma, which is 4015 people a year.

The last time I had a bad asthma attack at work because of perfume, I did not have an inhaler with me so an ambulance had to take me to the ER. There was a coworker who wore extremely heavy perfumes everyday and she triggered my asthma attack. I ask if I could possibly move to another desk and our occupational health department said, how long are we going to have to accomodate you for this issue? I said my asthma is permanent- it is a lung disease. They told me they could not move me or give me any special treatment because it would not be fair to other associates. I wasn't asking for special treatment, I just asked if I could move away from the trigger source. I asked if there was a possibility if they could ask associates to not wear perfumes and heavy scents to work in an office setting because of health issues. They outright refused and had no desire to do anything about it. Luckily for me, the woman was transfered to the field and soon left the office, but I was amazed at the lack of willingness to address a health concern issue.

For me, breathing is essential. I mean it is kind of important, you know? It can mean life or death to me if I cannot get any air into my lungs. So it blows me away when I see a lack of concern for something so essential as being able to breathe air.

I hate to have to ask somebody to not wear perfume or cologne because it is affecting me, because ultimately people have the right to do whatever they want to do, and sometimes people can really take offense to it and have a lack of understanding because they aren't educated to the dangers it poses to others. I know it sounds silly that perfume and scents can be dangerous, but for me they are. So do I say something or not... it's always a very tricky situation, yet it is also important for my own well being and health that I am able to breathe okay.

One thing I know is I am not invincible, no matter how much we would all like to believe that we are, we simply aren't.

That's all for today... PolarB out.

Tuesday, March 15, 2011


Hello Peeps!

Once again Spring is rolling around and I have to admit it is my favorite season of the year. Why you ask? Because I absolutely love everything coming to life and bursting through with new growth! The sun shines a little bit brighter and the temps are just perfect. The grass starts to really green up and the flower blossoms start to open and bloom! Fragrance fills the air and it pleases and delights my senses! I guess you could say that Spring really activates all my senses and gets them excited! There is nothing better than the scent of freshly mowed grass or the sweet nector or flowers and honeysuckle in the air. I love it! The smells of the outdoors make me feel alive and vibrant and really it makes me want to get outside and get moving! I really love the fact that everything is growing and Spring brings forth new life as there is a flutter of activity as the animals find their perfect mates and soon you see signs of new life being born everywhere.

Changes and growth are so essential to living. There is a constant ebb of motion to this whole wide world and the Earth is constantly rotating moving forward just as we are propelled forward in life by constant changes. Life sure would be boring without the possibility of change and growth don't you think? A lot of people resist change and dig their heels in to resist it, however life still moves forward even if you aren't on board. Whenever there is motion it causes a ripple effect that affects everyone and everything in it's path. Try throwing a stone into a pond and watch how the change to the water effects it and extends outward in a ripple effect. That is just like the changes we face in life. I am all for change and growth and pretty much have been all my life because my life was constantly changing. I've come to appreciate and value change because they are essential to moving forward and growing. Who wants to stay stuck in a rut and become stagnate? Certainly not me.

I've come to realize when people resist change it is because of one thing... can you guess what that is? Yes... it's that ugly four letter word. F-E-A-R

Fear will stop people in their tracks and it can paralyze you from moving forward and growing. It is the fear of the unknown because it is something new or unfamiliar to you. It's so easy to think the worst is going to happen when it comes to the unknown. We play that what if game in our minds, but all that does is make you crazy, so it's best to overcome the fear and do it anyway. I've seen people who would rather stay stuck in a bad situation because they had too much fear to move forward and make changes to their life. Once people overcome that fear, they often wonder why they resisted in the first place.

Not all changes turn out to be good, however guess what? You have the power to change it to something better! The choice is always yours. Whether it is a change to want to make to your personal life, your relationships, your job or move to a new home or anything you are looking to change, however small or large, you can do it, even if you are afraid of change, you can overcome those fears and move forward and you might just find you are much happier for it! Spring forward towards growth and you will find joy and blessings in the experience of change.

Bear Hugs!
PolarB ;)